You Just Come to Mommy
Oh, my poor darling. I know you only come to me when you have a question about understanding girls. Why are you so tense when you’re about to go on a date with your girlfriend, honey? Because she’s a tease?! Now, why would you say that? Oh… so, she doesn’t want to… go ALL the way… until marriage.
Well, honey, that’s perfectly understandable… but I know that young men need… ATTENTION… too. Honey, you just need to relax. You know Mommy will take care of everything.
Just lie on my bed, darling, and let me give you a nice, long, relaxing massage. You’ll be so rested; I’ll work out every knot, ball of tension, and HARD spot. Just concentrate on Mommy’s warm, soothing hands, the motherly touch you trust your worries to, and I’ll make sure you know just who to come to whenever you’re just so tense again.