|
My fellow erotica writer, Vasper Janik, and I were swapping sordid stories and
past experiences earlier today as we quickly realized the telling of the tales
was providing excellent motivation for writing. The very moments we'd been so
involved with at one instant in our lives were inspiring of their own accord:
great material for a story and superb imagery for poetry. Before we knew it,
Vasper was writing well into the night and I was jotting down subject ideas for
future stories.
This was long after my pal Vasper had once voiced that I "shouldn't fuck and
tell!" Well, to tell you the truth, I hadn't ever thought too much of it,
definitely not as to whether the concept was ethically "wrong" or not. Where
else does a writer get her inspiration or ideas for her fiction or nonfiction?
If we didn't live, we wouldn't have a single perspective to write from or
experience to write about. My belief is that everything a writer jots down is
from their own reality, from his past experience even if it was merely a dream,
fantasy, or shared by another.
We know that a writer outside the genre of erotica writes from what they
know, so if "fucking and telling" is morally wrong, then what would an erotica
author write from? It's the real-life moments that breathe life into our work,
that titillate us so much as people, that we're driven to the page to
share our excitement with others. Maybe there's just a kernel of true experience
in an entire novel, or a poem details an entire real-life scenario in which the
author was the actual central character. Either way, part of our writing will
always be true.
The belief that "fucking and telling" is not moral stems back to our school
days when the guys would gather in the locker room to brag about who snagged
which hot chick or got laid the night before. It goes back to our parents
dictating that sex is naughty or devious in general and shouldn't be spoken of.
Well, why the hell not?
What makes sex different? Is it the fact that certain body parts are
involved? That the act conjures up certain emotions and human connections? That
certain biological occurrences can result? The fact is that the only thing
making sex a topic different from any other is "them." It's in the invisible
(and sometimes visible) rule book written by our culture and society. Someone
started the mad craze, and it's still with us today.
Here stands the topic of sex, a beautiful, amazing, moving phenomenon, and
we're not supposed to talk about it. The good or bad feelings we
associate with sex can dictate our choices throughout our lives and motivate us
toward new directions. It's powerful, without a doubt. It needs to be
spoken of, shared, and given as a gift to others like any other part of life
that makes us damn glad to be alive in the first place and moves us to get out
of bed each day. Vasper's very words: "I think writing about intimate moments
that no-one else ever knows about can probably be quite ......what's the
word......liberating.........I mean why do we keep them to ourselves .....are
these moments so private? Are we embarrassed to talk about them...?"
Vasper and I were debating the entire subject today and came to the same
conclusion. We're not listening to "them" anymore. We're telling the world that
the coming together of two individuals is a wonderful thing. And it's our own
lives and experiences that will continue to propagate new tales that absolutely
must be told. To keep them a secret would just be greedy.
As for my friend, Vasper Janik...well,
he's a little shy at the moment, so you probably haven't heard much from him.
He'll be making his big online debut soon enough.
|
Tara's Trysts 
